i hate tuesdays..

The days have been different..
I feel like they are numbered, because yours were.
Sometimes I try to think of what I would have said to you in my goodbye.
But I never got that chance, maybe He spared me that.
I'm clueless in many ways.
I don't understand why your gone,
but I guess all I need to know is that it was the Lords timing.
I'm reminded of you countless times a day.
and I constantly find myself talking about you in present tense.
I hate past tense.
But this is all true, and I'm not dreaming.
I know the Lord will heal me of this pain eventually.
But I don't think we'll ever truly get over it, how can you?
I never knew my God this way, in the taking way.
I haven't lost like this, I didn't want to.
But my God knows what time is right.

I visited your grave sunday..
There lies your body, not your soul
I couldn't help but break down,
but Heather held me close..
It still doesn't seem real..

I'm jealous of the people who dream of you.
I've only had one and that was too long ago.